My Misery Muse Read online

  My Misery Muse

  By

  Brei Betzold

  My Misery Muse

  Copyright © 2013 by Brei Betzold

  Published January 8, 2013

  Publisher Brei Betzold

  This is a work of fiction. All characters, organizations, and events portrayed in this novel are either products of the author’s imagination or are used fictitiously.

  All rights reserved. This edition is copywritten by Brei Betzold and any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever without the express written permission of the author, except for the use of brief quotations in a book review. January 2013.

  Edited by Tanya Keetch

  Cover photo ©

  Istockphoto.com

  Cover Design by Sarah Hansen

  Table of Contents

  Chapter One. 7

  Chapter Two. 11

  Chapter Three. 15

  Chapter Four. 20

  Chapter Five. 25

  Chapter Six. 31

  Chapter Seven. 36

  Chapter Eight. 40

  Chapter Nine. 46

  Chapter Ten. 51

  Chapter Eleven. 56

  Chapter Twelve. 62

  Chapter Thirteen. 67

  Chapter Fourteen. 71

  Chapter Fifteen. 77

  Chapter Sixteen. 85

  Chapter Seventeen. 94

  Chapter Eighteen. 102

  Chapter Nineteen. 110

  Chapter Twenty. 118

  Chapter Twenty One. 124

  Chapter Twenty Two. 132

  Chapter Twenty Three. 138

  Chapter Twenty Four. 145

  Chapter Twenty Five. 151

  Chapter Twenty Six. 158

  Epilogue. 162

  Acknowledgments. 166

  About the Author. 168

  Chapter One

  “God I hate the women at that school,” I huffed as I walked to my station slamming down my keys and bag before turning to my best friend and boss Crispin.

  “If you hate them so much then why do you send him there?” Crispin didn’t bother looking up from the sketch he was working on, this was a frequent conversation.

  “You know why,“ I said. “It’s the best daycare in the area that I can afford. It’s not the teachers I dislike just the other moms who look at me like I’m a cockroach.”

  Crispin glanced up from his sketch then and I instantly knew the look and what he was going to say.

  “No one can make you feel inferior without your consent,” he said the same time I did, he looked at me and smirked. Then said, “If it’s really that bad Dev, why don’t you pull Jaks out of the school, he can hang out here at the shop while you work until you can find a new daycare?”

  “Cris, I appreciate the offer but you and I both know we can’t have a two year old running around a tattoo parlor. I’ll just deal with the women like I always do ignore them and mutter curses that their plastic tits spring a leak.”

  With my mini tirade done for the morning, I went to work getting my station set up for my first appointment of the day. It was still early when I was done so I decided to go next door to grab a cup of coffee for myself and Cris. I loved working the day shift at the shop more than I ever expected to. Up until I found out I was pregnant, I always insisted on working nights, it’s when most of the action is and when we are the busiest. I found though that working during the day, I have more time to put into my sketches. I also get a lot more one of the kind work. Doing the same flash over and over gets a little tedious after a while. I always try to change the flash up in some unique way for each client but it’s still more meaningful to have someone trust me enough to ink my own artwork into their body.

  I walk into the café next door and am instantly greeted with the smell of fresh brewed coffee, I inhale deeply and briefly close my eyes, nothing is better than coffee from Joe’s Café. I walk up and order Cris and my typical coffees, a mocha latte for him and a honey latte for me. While I’m waiting for our drinks I glance around the café, some of the people I recognize from the area, others are college kids hanging around for the summer. I pay and take our drinks when I happen to glance in the corner and almost drop the coffee. Sitting in the corner is the last person I ever expected to see again, Seth. Damn, he looked as gorgeous as ever. I knew when standing, he topped off at 6’2, he had wide shoulders that tapered down to lean hips, his muscles were well defined but sinewy like a swimmer. His dark hair was shaggy and mussed as ever and those eyes, the eyes that have haunted me for over 2 years are the color of spring grass after a rain. He had lips that were made for sin, full, lush and I can still remember biting them and the lip ring I enjoyed playing with. His nose had the hump in the middle from when my brother had broken it years before, and cheekbones most women would kill for, which were currently covered in a day or two’s worth of stubble. I could still picture how his eyes darken when he’s angry or turned on; I can still remember his scent, which was all Seth, spicy and completely masculine. He was dressed as he’d always dressed. Vintage rock t-shirt that clung to his chest, worn 501’s that molded to his ass and thighs perfectly, black work boots, his labret glinting in the light and tattoos peeking out from under his shirt sleeves. That man could do things to me, to my body that would light me up like a firecracker, but that didn’t mean I wanted to see him again.

  I’m not sure if he saw me or not and I have no intention of finding out, I hurry to the door open it and almost run back to the tattoo shop slamming the door on my way in. I rushed in and thrust Cris’s latte at him and hightail it to the back of the shop, into the room where we keep all of our equipment and shut the door. I have to sit down and put my head between my legs, trying to keep myself from passing out. I hear the door open and glance up to see Cris standing there with a concerned look on his face.

  “Dev what’s the matter, you look like you’ve seen a ghost?” says Cris.

  With that, I start laughing because it’s better than crying.

  ¯¯¯

  I saw her walk into the café and wasn’t sure what to do. God, she looked beautiful, but then again she always had. She’d changed her hair again, this time it was a pixie style cut and spiked, dyed black with purple streaks. It also seems she’d added to both her ink and piercings since the last time I’d seen her, but I would know her anywhere. She still had a body that with just a glance made me hard. She stood maybe 5’5 flat footed, her small perky breasts were gorgeous with rose colored nipples, hips that slightly swelled out from her waist, and legs that have always looked amazing in her favorite fishnet stockings. Her face stopped me as usual, she looked such like a pixie, and her small soft features, the lush lower lip she bit when nervous, her gorgeous large anime style cerulean blue eyes. She looked soft and vulnerable but I knew better, she had been strong and self-sufficient for as long as I knew her. She had to be, it’s not like she was ever good enough for her parents and they reminded her of that daily. She was as usual, dressed in clothing completely unique to Devi, a tight white ribbed tank top covering her curves and ended just above her belly button, a sexy ring in her belly button that the overhead light glinted off of. The tight black pants that molded to her ass and tied in the front rode low on her hips showing a tantalizing amount skin and her trade mark air brushed combat boots. God, I had missed her and was it fate’s cruel joke for her to walk into this café the first day I came back home? When she turned around and saw me she went even paler than her normal porcelain skin, I was worried she was going to faint, but no not my Devi, she would never show a weakness. I was just about to get up and say hi when she hightailed it out of the café like the hounds of hell were after her, and for all I know they were.

  I got up and walked to the barista and asked, “Hey
that woman that was just here, does she come here often?”

  The barista eyed him cautiously, “You mean Dev; yea she’s in here every morning, why?”

  “Do you know where I can find her?” I asked.

  “Yea sure, she works next door at Pin’s Ink, I have some of her business cards if you want one, over there on the counter.” With that she turned and went to the next customer.

  I grabbed a card and glanced down, Devlin Porter- Artist. Huh so she finally did it. I smiled at the memory of the two of us in our shithole apartment, Devi with her sketch pad working on something as usual and me behind her kissing her neck and trying to break her concentration. It never worked, she would just shrug me off and go back to her design. At that point, she was going to art school as well as working nights at an obscure shop as an intern doing generic flash that she would try and spice up without Trix, her mentor, finding out. He always knew, though he never said anything to her about it.

  I walked out into the sunlight pulled my sunglasses from my pocket and put them on then walked by the shop but couldn’t see Devi inside. Oh well I thought, I would find her soon enough of that I was damn determined. I walked over to my ‘6772 Chevelle SS Coupe and got in just as my cell rang, I quickly pulled it out of my pocket, glanced down, sighed and answered it.

  “I’m on my way now,” I growled then hung up, with one more glance at the parlor where Devi worked, I took off.

  Chapter Two

  Crispin was still watching me after my hysterical laughing jag and I knew I wouldn’t get away with telling him what was wrong. Concern was etched across his features. He knew me too well to know that nothing was wrong, might as well get it over with.

  I looked him in the eye and told him, “Seth is back.”

  That’s all it took Crispin was next to me in a second. “Back, what do you mean back, and how do you know?” he asked.

  “I just saw him next door at Joe’s.”

  “Oh damn,” was all he could said and that about summed it up for me as well.

  I stood and looked at my friend again, “I need to get out front, I have an appointment in a few minutes and I want to double check my station.”

  I turned away and walked out, hoping that if I dived into work I wouldn’t have to think about Seth and what his return meant, and worst of all, how still at just a glance he could affect me as no one else ever has. I walked by the stereo on the way to my station, flipped on Sevendust and cranked it up loud.

  I glanced up at the clock and had to do a double take, how was it already 5 o’clock? I was almost finished with the piece I was working on but knew I had another appointment after this one; I would never get out in time to pick up Jaks. I glanced over and saw Cris finish taping off his client and discussing aftercare.

  “Hey Cris, how long until your next appointment?”

  He glanced over at the clock, “In about an hour, why need me to go get Jaks?”

  “If you wouldn’t mind, I am almost finished with him. Then I have one more that should be here any minute, everything is all worked up for it. It shouldn’t take more than an hour or so.”

  I glanced over at Jules our shop tech, “Hey Jules, do you mind babysitting duty for a little bit, my treat on first round next time we go to margarita night?”

  Jules looked over and laughed, “Dev, you do not have to bribe me to watch that angel but I’ll still take you up on margarita night.”

  With Jaks taken care of, I went back to the tribal arm band I was working on, and finished coloring everything in with the Indian black ink. Cris finished up with his customer, gave me a wave and left to get Jaks.

  Just as my customer was walking out the door, Cris came in carrying Jaks. He saw me and started shrieking and wiggling to get away from Cris. Cris put him down and Jaks took off when his feet barely touched the floor. I snatched him up and kissed him. He looked at me and gave me his lopsided grin, and I thought back to when I saw Seth at the café this morning. Looking at Jaks was like looking at a carbon copy of Seth. The black hair and green eyes, dimple in his left cheek, and the lopsided grin that won women’s hearts everywhere. The only part of me I see in my son is the creases that form between his eyebrows when he’s upset.

  “Hey baby, how was school?” I asked Jaks.

  “It good, Moli kissed me again,” replied Jaks.

  I laughed, my son was a lady killer just like his dad. “OK baby, Mommy is almost done, why don’t you go play with Jules while I finish up?”

  “K Mommy,” he replied and I put him down and watched him bolt.

  I glanced over at Cris and caught him covering a laugh at Jaks being kissed again at school. He looked up and winked at me then walked over to his station and starts prepping for his next client. I blew Jaks one more kiss then went to do the same while Jules took Jaks back to the office to play while I finished up with my work.

  ¯¯¯

  I looked through the window of the shop and watched her work; damn, she’s amazing. I still can’t believe it’s been almost 3 years since I last saw her. She was 19 then and I was 21, both stupid kids in love. She never wavered from her plans or her vision for her life, while I drifted with my music, the guys and I messing around not really getting serious until I was 20. The big reason I got serious was because of her, she had it all planned out at the age of 16, get into art school, moonlight as an apprentice for a tattoo artist and start her career on her terms by the age of 20. She even went to the effort of graduating a year early from high school so she could make her dream come true. All I was doing was screwing around with my bass and drinking with the guys, I decided if she could go after her dreams then I could too, I owed her that much.

  I looked at her again and saw her smiling and laughing at something her customer said. Did another quick glance around the shop and saw Cris sitting across from her with his own customer laughing, hmm so she’s working with Cris now, I didn’t expect that. I opened the door and walked in, neither of them looked up immediately, her client is asking her about her tats and then points out one particular one that’s on her forearm. I can’t help but chuckle, remembering the story about the 50’s pin up sitting in a provocative pose straddling a tattoo gun that was inked into her forearm. She stopped what she was doing when she heard me chuckle and looked up at me. When I look into her eyes I am not sure what I first saw there, it looked like panic, but I brush it away.

  “She got that particular tat in LA, 5 years ago.” I said, “She always has been a fan of pin up girls and tattoo guns.” I looked up and our eyes met. Her customer looked at me then to her and decided not to comment.

  We just stared at each other and the tension was building between us as it always did, she licked her bottom lip and I couldn’t help but notice the stirring in my pants. Then she looked back at her work and didn’t look back up. At that point, Cris finished with his piece, got up and walked over to me.

  “Hey Seth long time, how have you been doing?” he asked.

  I shot a glance back at Devi then answered, “Oh you know touring, working in the studio.”

  He grinned, “Sounds like fun, so is it just you in town or are all the boys back?”

  “We’re all back for a while, Xavier set up a studio at his place and we decided to work on this album at home.”

  I noticed Cris shoot a glance over towards Devi and couldn’t help glancing over myself, she was still studiously ignoring me.

  “Well I am finished up for the night Seth, want to go out and grab a beer or two, catch up and all that?”

  Just then a guy came in from somewhere in back, he looked faintly familiar but I couldn’t place him.

  “Dev, your monster was using my pencils again. I had to sharpen them again, that’s the third time this week,” he said.

  She glanced up and smirked at him, “Yea well, if you put your shit up he wouldn’t get to them, would he?” she responded.

  He looked over at Cris, “You’re not going to say anything are you?” he asked.

  Cr
is looked at him, “Nope, cause I had to pick them up off the floor again, so I left them on the desk for him to color with, start putting your stuff up.” Cris shook his head and looked at me again.

  “So what do you say about those beers?” he asked.

  The guy stomped off muttering under his breath, I looked over at Devi and saw she was just finishing up with cleaning her client off. Then a door banged open and with a squeal a little kid streaked out of the room laughing and a young girl running after him. Cris spun around and the kid leapt to him laughing the whole time while the girl was muttering under her breath. Cris looked over at me then at Devi who had stopped what she was doing to stare at the child. I got my first good look at him and felt like I had been sucker punched and all the air left my body as I looked at my face on this little boy[TK1] .